Cat-astrophes

OMIGOSH!

Two posts TWO days in a row!!!

Either:

1. I have too much time on my hands (see yesterday's post)
2. I'm procrastinating
3. I have something so insanely profound to say that I just couldn't wait another second before proclaiming it to the world...

I'm afraid it is 2.

Today I move back to my parents' house. This marks an interesting season indeed! Mr Some-Kind-Of-Wonderful (today's pseudonym courtesy of Joss Stone) will be staying at my little abode from this day forth...which means in the last week it has become some kind of mish-mash of 'boy meets girl'.

I'm very aesthetic - meaning everything *must* be in its correct place...either alphabetical or in order of subject, height, colour, date or however else I can organise it. This makes me appear a very organised person...I'm not - I just forget where things are, so they need to be somewhat logical.

Mr SKOW is a little more practical. If there's a space, it'll go there regardless of whether its in my purple room or red room or a blue chest of drawers smack bang in the middle of the green room.

The frustrating thing is...he's right. Unfortunately Little Home means Little Space. Trying to stuff two lifetimes into the one flat which was very full in the first place makes me appreciate the fact Mr SKOW doesn't have as much stuff as me.

...mostly I appreciate the fact that he has waaaaaaaaay less clothes than me - when you have had a full wall-length built in wardrobe to yourself for so many years that you have managed to fill by your itty bitty teeny weeny self...it is *very* difficult to downgrade. On an aside....how come with a full wall-length built in wardrobe full of clothes is it possible to still not have anything to wear??? hehe

Anyway...so that brings me back to point number 2. Procrastination.

In my efforts to make the place look less like 'him' and 'me', and more like 'us', I find that inevitably as in all of my cleaning endevours...I begin to get sidetracked...and before you know it, I'm rambling garbage.

xxx

Yes, I've been quiet.

But my world has been noisy.

With such a long list of things 'to do' I have no idea why I have taken the time to write about the fact that I have no time...and now I'm writing about writing about having no time....

I've realised how subjective time really is though. Three months ago I was originally going to be married tomorrow...

...three months seemed to be plenty of time...

Now I have to admit I'm glad we changed the date (ha...did I scare anyone?). Yes, it'll be winter, and yes it'll be cold...

...but most importantly I have an extra three months with my own surname...

hehe

No, I know that a wedding can be pulled off in three months (even less...) but it's amazing how you seem to work to your own time. If we were still getting married tomorrow, I know that we would've *found* the time to have everything done. Granted there would have been a few things out of our hands - sick parents and the like...but in terms of organisation I know it could be done.

So why with the extra time do I still feel so busy?

At least I managed to squeeze in a little time away. That was definately needed!

xxx

Firstly I would like to say that I have now had uninterrupted sleep for two nights in a row! *bliss*

Secondly I would like to talk about tenuate.

I love discovering how people stumble upon this blog. Often it is x-rated searches generated by my little sign-off with kisses (however, I refuse to change it). Lately I have had a whole range of other hits. Often they will take a subject from one entry and link it with another ie 'Pidgeon toes' will lead to my pidgeon escapades and my narrow escape from drowning in the carpet.

The search that has caught my eye today is 'tenuate'. I'm not entirely sure how I was linked to this appetite-suppressant, but there you have it. You name it and I will appear...

I'm about to reveal my immaturity though. In my own search to discover what this stuff was I discovered a phonetic breakdown of 'diethylpropion' - (dye eth ill PROE pee on) and giggled for far too long at the 'pee on' part.

In fact I was so amused by my own silliness I felt inclined to admit it to the world.

Yes, I Cat giggled at my own pee-joke.

I think I need to get out more.

xxx

If you have read any of my entries in the last few months you would know that sleep is very precious to me.

Lately it hasn't been happening.

I love my neighbours, I truly do. They are lovely people. Apparently they love each other very much too.

It is great that they have a healthy relationship, and fine if their healthy relationship kept me awake for a night...but when it has been four nights running (long nights) and no volume of music played in my room can drown out noises it gets a bit much.

What is the etiquette in these sorts of situations? If I was in a hotel, I would throw a shoe at the wall because I don't know them, they don't know me and I probably won't see them tomorrow anyway.

If I throw a shoe at the wall here it is a little obvious as to who owns the shoe. Do I slip a little note under their door - 'Can we please all get a little shut-eye tonight?'

Surely they must be tired too?

Originally I thought 'hmm, how awkward', but it is becoming a little more awkward as their healthy relationship appears to be getting healthier, and there are now strange noises throughout the day also - which has made entertaining visitors very awkward.

You know that little pause of quiet when you both break from talking about your latest shopping bargain to take a sip from your hot chocolate? I used to savour that moment. Now I find that I am doing all I can from preventing that moment because I know that it isn't going to all be 'quiet'... unless I have music playing at a deafening level...which isn't very hospitable now anyway...

I was wondering whether this was pay-back for my latest addition - for Christmas I was given a surround sound system...

Now I'm certainly surrounded by sound, but it is coming through 30cm thick concrete walls.

So I'm at a loss. I need sleep. I don't want to offend good neighbours. I don't want to have x-rated sound effects at g-rated hours of the day when I can't turn up music loud because my friend is chatting about her latest hair style and whether she should go from chestnut to fireball.

WHAT DO I DO???

At about 4am last night I discovered that headphones were more effective than speakers and finally got 2 hours sleep before my phone (which doubles as mp3 player) ran out of songs and I was awoken again.

...do you think I could hand out complimentary headphones to guests?


xxx

So there are now two weeks left of holidays.

That sounds like a lot. And it is...I'm grateful for it...but this is the time that it suddenly dawns on me that in two weeks time, 28 little midgets are going to walk into my classroom and though they have been to school before, they would have forgotten everything - 6 weeks is a long time for a 6 year old.

Last year I thought I was prepared...until I told them to sit at their desks, open their books and fold their arms.

Mistake #1 - don't give multiple instructions to kidlings just out of kindergarten.

Then we played sound (phonics) bingo.

Mistake #2 - assuming your class know their sounds is too optimistic. There are a lot of letters in the English alphabet after all.

I won't even begin with the disasters of lunchtime. Or when I discovered that two of my girls had severe emotional trauma and would swing into sporadic violent tantrums with no warning.

So this time I realise that in my little group of 28 I may have some knowing everything, and some knowing nothing, with the ones in between full of many many surprises. I decided to start planning, programming and organising things ready for that first week.

The only problem is although I have had 3 and a half weeks of 'almost nothing' my body feels as though I have worked all the way through the holidays. I have a list of things to do, and phonics games to create and all I can think about is laying my head down on the keyboard and ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....

oh yes, and eating all those Ferrero Rochers so I can use the boxes to put the phonics games in....


xxx

And I thought I was busy before...

What a whirlwind end to 2006! I don't think I could have had any more excitement if I tried!

Though 2007 is already shaping up to be a busy year. 3 milestones already loom ahead and they are all major events that I never would have dreamed would all happen in the same year. Though time frames have been set, plans have begun to roll in motion and all of a sudden it has dawned on me that my life is about to undergo huge change this year.

...a lot can happen in a year...

I'm sure I'll elaborate later...but for now you'll have to be satisfied with ellipses...

...and if you know me, I'm sure I'll elaborate to your face...

ha, that sounds like a threat...'I'll elaborate yer face real good...'

xxx

3 days to go!!

Holidays are nearing and school is winding up. I've been stripping my classroom bare and getting ready to start all over again.

My body cannot wait to relax! The stress-factor is trying to continue regardless of the fact I'm refusing to 'take work home' - that includes the emotional side of work too. As soon as that bell goes, I'm no longer 'miss' and I really couldn't care less about what Ali did to Ahmad and how little Mohammad's mum is angry at Moustafa and wants to make a formal complaint to get him expelled from the school......

I might not take the emotional frustration home, but it is amazing how it can still make a physical impact. Even now I have droopy eyelids, and if it wasn't for the fact that it is nearing 5:30 and time to cook dinner I would be more than happy to head for bed.

Anyway - what lays before me is 3 days of near-babysitting. I have finished my program for the year, it's a cinema-day tomorrow and reports go home so most students don't turn up after that...so Wednesday and Thursday will consist of keeping students entertained whilst other teachers get to moving their classes in preparation for the new year.

...and crossing fingers for lots of chocolatey Christmas presents this year! Though being a predominantly muslim-populated school, things tend to be a bit low in the Chrissy pressie stakes...

xxx

Have you ever noticed that it is the companies that take the largest amounts of your money that give you the worst service? Or maybe it is just me.

Am I the only one who sits on hold thinking 'you're about to take $545 of mine so answer the rotten phone!!'. For this reason I like to support small businesses (if it's not going to be a risk - ie insurance). However then you have a problem if you try to call to tell them you want to spend $300 but they don't answer the phone...and they have no form of answering service.

In other words you end up wasting an hour of your life calling, waiting, calling, waiting, calling....etc

Or maybe I am just how my post title suggests.

xxx

2 weeks and one day!

Still tired...which is to be expected, however my latest challenge is trying to fit in 'other stuff' in those few waking moments not spent cooking, eating, showering or working.

Trying to think about and co-ordinate 5 seperate entertaining events up and coming over the next fortnight is turning out to be almost impossible!

Anyway - in my quest to try to make things easier and more time-efficient I turned to the cyber-world and became mesmerised by the image on the Bathers' Pavillion website. So much so infact that I have been staring at it for quite some while. It is rather soothing to watch when your eyes just want to close...

The bad thing is I have now wasted some of this precious time staring and accomplished nothing - except a blog entry I never intended to write...

xxx

Around this time last year I started having dizzy spells, blacking out and I was just thoroughly exhausted. I went through a series of blood tests, they found a few things, slapped on the label 'chronic fatigue' and gave me a list of lifestyle changes.

I have been pretty good at keeping them and I have to admit this year has been a little easier - a little. I still have my moments when all I want to do is curl up and sleep for a week...but overall it has been okay.

Then came the dizzy spells again.

Friday I collapsed at work. Thankfully not in front of the kiddies - when I knew I was on my way out I went to the back of the room and stuck my head into my colleagues room and managed to get out 'can you watch them' before getting out of my room and falling.

So my amazing man came and picked me up from school and I slept the rest of the day. In fact, most of my weekend was sleeping.

Monday came around and I was ready to take on the world...or at least the school. By 9 o'clock however I was already feeling a little tired. By 11 o'clock I was quite lethargic. By 1 o'clock I was downright sleepy and by 3pm it was all I could do to try and get home fast enough before I knew I was going to sleep at the wheel.

So I'm back to square 1. Sleep, work, sleep, eat, sleep.

Only 2 weeks and 3 school days left to the end....If only I can stay awake enough until then...

xxx

A stormy Monday...

Storms are marvelous...I love them...however kids don't seem to like them so much.

So on days like today, a room full of six and seven year-olds becomes a high-pitched nightmare.

"eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!!"
"miiiiiiiiiisssss!!!! I'm scaaaaaaaaaaaared!!!"

What's more, a lot of these students are refugees and are quite nervous individuals as it is without including loud explosive noises into the equation...if you get my drift....

To top it all off, one of these nervous individuals was receiving a prize at a big assembly in the midst of this storm, and whilst standing on stage infront of the whole school during what should've been a happy moment, her poor nervous bladder gave up. The embarassment turned out to be too much also, so she proceeded to bite her lip....

...until her tooth went straight through her lip. The shock made her freeze.

So aside from controlling a class of 20-something little hyperactive storm-crazed monkeys I had to literally drag a terrified, wet, bleeding 6 year old from the stage.

I won't talk about the row of kindy kids that freaked out at the sight of blood...

So yeah, it's just been another typical Monday.

xxx

PS - the title is in tribute to Saturday night's U2 concert...just dandy. (I've been wanting to use that word all day)

xxx

So I've been having computer issues...and I've had better things to do than fix them. So it is only now that I have had the time to get around to rectifying all those little bugs.

However in order to do so I had to wipe the whole machine and start from scratch. Even though I laborously sorted through files, deleted, saved, deleted, burnt....it amazes me how many 'things' I've still lost.

Tax files being one of them....oops...........

I'm sure I've backed it all up somewhere...right?

xxx

So it seemed like the battle was over. Mr Handyman drove off in his little white van leaving behind more spikes (sadly no big red eye...) and the stupid birds sat on my balcony coo-coo-cooing and wondering what to do.

I threw a cushion at the window and that gave them something to do for the brief moment...

I was happy. Man triumphed over pidgeon.

I celebrated with an iced tea, and sat back on my comfy lounge.

Then I heard it.

tap tap tap tap tap....tappity tappity....cooo? tap tap tap

You have to be kidding.

Mr handyman spiked a pidgeon in the roof!!

That was obviously a few days ago. The tapping has since stopped - so whether someone called someone to come and rescue the crazy bird, or whether I should be expecting a fowl (pun intended) smell soon....I don't quite know....

And here I thought the whole pidgeon-ordeal was over...

xxx

My ongoing battle with pidgeons in the roof is continuing. Though this time there is one *big* bird up there...

Strata must've finally called someone in to get rid of the birds...however it doesn't sound like they are too fazed by his presence.

I can hear 'bang bang bang bang' as Mr Pidgeon-Man crawls across one side of the roof and 'patter patter patter patter' as StupidPidgeon walks over to the other side. This has been happening for the last 15 minutes.

Bang bang bang bang shuffle bang

patter patter patter patter patter "cooooo"

There was silence for awhile until 'crrrack'...a massive ladder landed right outside my window (glass intact). It is rather uncomfortable when there is a handyman leaning on your 3rd story window and you have no place to go...do you hide, smile and wave, completely ignore or open up the window and offer milk and cookies?

It has now been silent for 10 minutes...I'm wondering who has won. Maybe Mr Pidgeon Man brought one of those big red eyes!

xxx

So the waters have dried up, the carpet has been deoderised* and furniture has been returned.

I include a little asterisk (*) because all though the carpet has been deoderised, a putrid stench still remains. Smells are one thing I don't deal with. Everything must smell good. I have air fresheners everywhere - 2 in the bathroom, one in each room, one in the car, closet, garage, classroom...so soggy old brown carpet smell does not make peace with me at all.

Yesterday I mentioned burning incense.

I've also made a staggering discovery. Copious amounts of incense not only clears the sinuses, but irritates eyes and brings on lightheadedness and dizzy spells. SO...I conclude that the happy hippy generation weren't really high on suspicious substances...it was really all to do with the incense.

Now excuse me whilst I tie-dye my underwear.

xxx

You know when you have those 'feelings' that something isn't quite right? Well, I had one of those 'feelings' yesterday when I was out getting a hair cut. My stomach started getting butterflies...then there was that sinking feeling as I remembered my washing.

I had left the machine on as I left...which I do often...though this time I was getting butterflies.

As my head was getting massaged during the whole shampoo-ing process all I could think of was my washing...and a puddle. I could visualise water all over the floor.

The hair-dresser made friendly chit-chat...how's work? What have you been doing with your holidays? etc etc....all I could think of was water trickling onto the floor and into the laundry cupboard, saturating the washing powder inside for the 7th time.

I met up with a friend for lunch afterwards...again...washing washing washing washing....

I went home and straight to the laundry...I got to the kitchen, and fair enough - a puddle.

Gut-feeling is correct once again. Sighing, and rather calmly I set down the shopping, arranged my newest lillies in a vase and decided to make a trip to the bathroom before mopping up the laundry/kitchen floor.

I kicked off my shoes, walked into the loungeroom and....squelch.

I froze.

My eyes fell to the floor to see my feet sitting cozily in about a centimetre of water. Oh no...my toes felt around to see how far the water reached...I moved the couch...more water...I moved the corner chair...more water...Oh no....I moved the other couch... more water!! In fact, water covered a quarter of my oversized loungeroom floor.

Immediately I grabbed a towel and threw it on the floor...and immediately picked it up again when my beautiful white towel started to soak up ugly brown water!! Stoopid rental apartment carpet...of course I had nothing else to mop up the mess with except a hand towel and a tea towel. So I set to it with a bucket, and this is how Mr Man found me - standing in a puddle with my jeans rolled up to my knees wringing coffee-brown water into a bucket.

So now it is 24 hours since the whole ordeal. The floor is still damp, but at least no longer provides a habitat for duckies and what-not...I have every window open and the house stinks. I have burnt so much insense I now have an urge to sit cross legged and say 'Ohm'. In fact the smell is so bad my teenage brother (might I remind you what the potencey of the smells of a teenage boy potentially could be) said "Do me a favour and don't invite me over - next time you're visiting us".

How depressing.

Amusing...but depressing...

xxx

There is nothing quite like a few slices of pumpernickel in the morning. It's almost like compacted bread - it takes up less room, but may even be more filling...

Usually I couple a slice of pumpernickel with a range of toppings - my favourite is cranberry sauce, baby spinach, turkey and Camembert cheese. Another is the simple but classic cream cheese & smoked salmon...but I only ever eat it as an open sandwich.

Today I decided to walk on the wild side and make a closed sandwich with the little dark rye bread...(yep, holidays must be in full swing when sandwich making becomes exciting...)

Pumpernickel is not so good for this purpose...the squeeze-factor involved when eating a sandwich puts too much stress on the bread for it to remain intact...and the result is many many pieces of squishy rye all over my floor.

Many pieces.

Many squishy pieces.

This brings me to a new dilemma.
Food sometimes scares me...emetophobia is a fear of vomiting...not only do I fear it, but there are a stack of things I 'can't do' because of it. Now over the years I have improved a little - I can now drink orange juice again - still can't even think about drinking apple juice. I can't eat fruit more than 4 days after I have bought it, nor consume food that has been made/cooked after the second day. Silly, I know...but I guess that's the nature of it - it's irrational.

What does this have to do with pumpernickel?

One of my little 'quirks' involves picking up food off the ground. I will do it, because obviously it needs to be done, but I start to get anxious...I don't know how my head seems to think that picking up dropped food is going to make me sick...it's not like I'm licking the floor...

Hmmm...anyway, so after cleaning up after breakfast I had to go lie down from emotional exhaustion.

I think I need to get out of the house...

xxx

Not something I thought I would ever be blogging about...but I had the *best* guacamole ever last night!

In fact, this guacamole was so good I couldn't sleep because I was thinking about it so much.

It was there still in my mind when I woke...and even now that I have just eaten breakfast it's all I can do to stop thinking about it still...

I've craved many things before, but I think this is the first time I have craved guacamole...

I'm even having issues typing....if I close my eyes I can still remember the taste....mmmm....

...excuse me...

xxx

My cupboards were bare and my stomach grumbled in protest of not being fed. Pasta sauce and cereal didn't sound appetising so I ventured off to the shops for groceries.

What I didn't know was that the shopping centre was being rennovated. There was no way of actually getting from the carpark into the centre aside from a temporary service lift.

Yes, you read me right - a temporary lift. I'm sorry but elevators should not be temporary!!

I stood inside with 5 others wondering how stable this thing actually is when it suddenly shuddered to life. The jolt was enough to give some unsuspecting person whiplash - so I did what any girl would do. I squeeled.

A few people giggled. "You'll get used to it, dear" an ederly lady comforted me. I don't want to get used to it!!

The stop was just as rough and coupled with a big 'BOOOM!'. I stumbled out and fell to my knees, kissing the ground...

...okay, I didn't do that, but I have never been so excited to get out of an elevator before (except maybe the time the one in my old building broke down between floors).

I took my time shopping - I was certainly in no hurry to return to that glorified laundry chute. However, it wasn't until I was standing infront of it again that I realised that this was the 'going down' part...I could very well plummet to my death here...I was interupted by some loud booming noises - boom boom boom boom boom boom...for a moment I couldn't work out whether it was the lift or my heart...

The door opened, and this time I held on...

Yet, even though I braced myself I couldn't help the scream that escaped...

"YAAAAAaaaaaAAAAAGH!!"

Can I just say that free-fall rides at amusement parks now seem like see-saws in comparison?

Who needs bungee-jumping when you can go elevator diving?

xxx